Thursday, September 21, 2006

Fury Stuff with add bonus: Lawyers versus Marketing

Auran CEO Tony Hilliam, Fury Lead Designer Adam Carpenter and Art Director Jason Robson share their thoughts on what went down at PAX’06 over on our own site.

Game Musketeers has a interview with our Producer Paul Whipp.

There are few other write-ups that I’ve proof read for Paul and Adam that should pop-up in the next few days. I know what you are thinking, "You? Proof read?!" Well not "proof reading" for grammar or anything like that. Content proof-reading type stuff: don’t use that word because it makes it sound like your implying this when you really mean that. That sort of stuff.

If I hadn’t gotten into Games I would have probably done really well in marketing. That is kind of odd since I consider marketing people to be the most evil people on the planet.

The common belief is lawyers are the most evil, but that is only because marketing people have sold you on that idea to throw you off the real scent. You see lawyers are just tools. You got an lawyer to fight for you? Well I can hire my own lawyer to fight your lawyer. We can send them off in the arena, I mean, courtroom to fight it out while we head off to Starbucks for some coffee. But if you got a marketing evil demon trying to sell me on something, I can’t hire my own marketing demon to fight your marketing demon. By the time we get back they can have it all worked out.

For example, there used to be a commercial for Lucky’s super-market. They claimed to be the “Low Price Leader” and to prove this they had an independent accounting firm with an impeccable reputation choose 100 items at random and then they compared their price on those items with those of other stores. Would you believe it that Lucky’s actually had the lower prices of all the stores!!! Boy that would sure have been embarrassing for them if they shot that commercial with the hot babe (I’m lying she wasn’t hot, I actually found her annoying) only to have to admit at the end that another super market had a lower price on those randomly chosen items. How did they know they would come out cheaper? An accounting firm with an impeccable reputation, items chosen at RANDOM! Why it’s water tight, they must actually be the low price leader!

Now see if I were to hire my own marketing person he could try and sell Lucky’s on the idea that I am the Ultimate Shopper! But that doesn’t really break their “Low Price Leader” evil plan!

But wait! If I were to hire a lawyer he would point out that Lucky’s never said just how many times they had the accounting firm choose 100 items at random. Isn’t it true Mr. Lucky’s that you actually had the accounting firm pick 100 items at random hundreds of times? And of all those lists where some times you came out lower and some times you came out higher didn’t you then picked which list of 100 items that you used on your commercials? The list where you came out the lowest? Isn’t it also true that you caught your wife having an affair with your best friend and in a fit of jealous rage murdered them both and concealed their bodies in the false bottom of your refrigerator where my client found them when putting away the cantaloupes he purchased at a competitor’s super-market?!

See the lawyer is my tool which I can use to defeat the evil marketing person and marking people know that which is why they decided to make us all think lawyers are the evil ones! You know that joke, “Why don’t sharks eat lawyers? Professional curtesy.” Marketing people came up with that joke!

Maybe later I’ll tell you how the anti-violent video game movement is actually a front for the Zombie Army. No really I figured it all out. It’s obvious once you see the pattern.

3 comments:

BugHunter said...

"Game Musketeers has a interview with our Producer Paul Whipp.

...Content proof-reading type stuff: don’t use that word because it makes it sound like your implying this when you really mean that. That sort of stuff."

I hope you're not implying that there isn't any collision detection in Fury. :)

http://www.fury-sanctuary.com/forum/collision-detection-vt131.html

Joseph the Fourth said...

To give a really good example of what I meant, Adam was talking about different ways of building incarnations in another up coming piece. He said his balanced incarnation can’t defeat another designer’s “lock-down and damage” incarnation. I reworded that to his ‘well-rounded’ incarnation has a hard time beating another designers ‘lock-down & damage’ incarnation one on one.

“Balanced” is a word that already has a lot of baggage and people would take it the wrong way when you said a ‘balanced’ incarnation couldn’t beat another type. They would see that as not being balanced. I should also add here that many of the abilities we are testing are not in fact balanced at all and will under go a lot of tuning in the next few months.

The rest of that changing “can’t beat” to “has a hard time against” and then stressing that we are talking specifically about 1 on 1 combat to help people understand that’s what he was talking about. A well rounded incarnation can sure beat a lock down & damage incarnation in healing, buffing, escaping, crystal carrying, charge manipulation, etc.

Joseph the Fourth said...

Oh and yes we have player collision in War Zones.