Saturday, February 06, 2010

Back to the Past

There has been talk of a Back to the Future remake circulating around the internets. I personally wanted to be counted among those that thinks this is a horrible idea. But, there has always been one thing about the trilogy that has bugged me.

Well, first I hate that the third movie was them back in the wild west instead of them jumping back through the first and second movie, like they jumped back into the first movie in the second. I was really expecting a clever three layered time travel extravaganza, since they shot the second and third movies back to back. That is what is cool about time travel movies!

And that is the problem, they really didn't take advantage of the fact they are doing time travel stuff! Case and point: the big problem in the third movie is that they are stuck in 1885 because the DeLorean has run out of gas and the flying circuits have been destroyed. Thats why they have to do the whole thing with putting the car on the train tracks to get it up to 88 miles per hour which nearly gets them killed. Why didn't they just go back to where Doc Brown hid the DeLorean in the mine and stick a note in there that read, "Marty, bring some extra gas. Love Doc Brown." There, problem solved.


Joseph B. Hewitt IV said...

Dear Marty,

If my calculations are correct, you will receive this letter immediately after you saw the DeLorean struck by lightning.

First, let me assure you that I'm alive and well. I've been living happily these past 8 months in the year 1885. The Lightning bolt that hit the DeLorean cause a gigowat overload which scrambled the time circuits, activated the flux capacitor and, and sent me back to 1885. The overload shorted out the time circuits and destroyed the flying circuits. Unfortunately the car will never fly again. I set myself up as a blacksmith, as a front while I attempted to repair the damage to the time circuits. Unfortunately, this proved impossible because suitable replacement parts won't be invented until 1947. However, I've gotten quite adept in shoeing horses and fixing wagons. I've buried the DeLorean in the abandoned DelGado mine, adjacent to the old Boot Hill Cemetery as shown on the enclosed map. There it should remain undisturbed and preserved until you uncover it in 1955. Inside you will find repair instructions. My 1955 counterpart... should have no trouble repairing it so that you can drive it back to the future. Once you have returned to 1985 destroy the time machine... I am perfectly happy living in the fresh air and wide open spaces. And I feel that unnecessary time travel only risks further disruption of the time line. And please take care of Einstien for me... I know you will give him a good home. Remember to walk him twice a day and that he only likes canned dog food.

These are my wishes. Please respect them and follow them. And so, Marty, I now say farewell and wish you god-speed. You have always been a good and loyal friend to me, and you have made a real difference in my life. I will always treasure our relationship, and think on you with fond memories, warm feelings, and a special place in my heart.

Your friend in time, "Doc" Emmett L. Brown September 1, 1885.

Tim said...

My friend I feel you are overthinking these movies! I think you'll find the awesomeness of the train scene instantly cancels out any of its ludicrous unnecessary nature.

Also am I the only guy to think Doc Brown looked badass with his long coat, hat and sniper rifle. Totally badass.

Joseph B. Hewitt IV said...

Anybody with long hair looks good in a overcoat. Hell, even I looked good with long hair and my totally bad-assed, leather overcoat! Believe it or not, I used to even get the attention of the ladies!

Sigh... I miss those days.